My older sister has always been a role model to me. She’s been my best friend and someone I have looked up to for as long as I can remember. My sister, Abigail, is three and a half years older than me. Even though she is almost four years older, we act as if we are twins. We both are reminded of our similarities every time we’re together, always having to face the question, “Are you twins?”.
Even though we would always get mistaken for twins, we have continued to deny the fact that we look too similar to one another, even though whenever we look through baby pictures there’s always the question of “which one is this?”. We have always shared similar features, often debating which feature came from what parent. We both usually get compared to each other a lot, and though it is annoying, the compliments make it better. Whenever we get compared to one another, we do act annoyed towards each other, with me usually telling her to stop copying me and then getting hit with her saying, “I was born first”.
Although, there are more similarities than differences with her being three inches taller than me and having a complexion of dark and light brown hair, which is due to dying her hair several times. Abbie has two ear piercings, two nose piercings, and her septum pierced, while I only have my ears pierced. She has been working on completing several tattoos over her body since she was eighteen years old.
Our parents knew that we had a bond. Our mom loves to tell the story of my first word, which is now Abbie’s nickname. We both laugh and then I get embarrassed at how obsessed I was with her. Our mom told us that Abbie went upstairs to grab something and I was starting to throw a fit by crawling after her and yelling “Abs”. Most parents expect and wish for their children’s first words to be “Mom” or “Dad”, our parents especially, but they were left with their oldest daughter’s name being called out by their youngest; it left them shocked and unexpected for what was to come.
Abbie has no memory of this event, always claiming she was too young to remember. She continued to say, “everytime I hear the story it makes me happy and sort of honored. It shows that we used to have a bond and still do have it”. Abbie believes that my first word is the reason why I copy her so much, then comes to the conclusion that this is why we’re so close now. We’ve always been sisters, but have chosen to be friends as well.
Abbie’s always been an introvert. Although she’s introverted and quiet when meeting new people, she eventually becomes more comfortable and shows her true personality – becoming extroverted with the friendship. She gets more social with the more time she spends with someone, but she can become annoyed and irritated when she spends too much time with the same person.
“I feel like we’re actually a lot alike when it comes to our personalities. We both get annoyed when we hangout for too long except for each other, which is really weird but it’s totally okay. We only hangout with each other anyways.” -Abbie
I recall her friend living with us for two weeks a couple years ago. Abbie had been hanging out in my room more and explaining about how she felt that the situation was all too much. Once the friend had found somewhere else to stay and left our house, Abbie was relieved and sighed out, “I’m going to my room”, in a sarcastic voice.
Abbie had then left to go to her room and left her door open, which was usually the sign that she wanted to hangout. We ended up staying up for way too long, watching multiple TV series, gossiping about the show, forcing her to help me find something to wear, and sharing laughs.
Abbie has been through a lot, and I not only look up to her for it, but I feel bad for her. We have also been through a lot together. Our parents got divorced when I was eight, and Abbie had just turned eleven. Before our parents got divorced, Abbie already knew what was happening. She said she had a clue but didn’t tell anyone because she didn’t want to scare me. Abbie had also changed from a childish person to someone who became more adult-like, and I realized that my older sister would do anything to not hurt me or my feelings.
Even though Abbie was in the start of middle school, she already had responsibilities of those much older than her. She reminded me to do homework, helped me with my school work, got me food, and walked me in and out of the school. Abbie would always take care of me, she still does, and always will.
Abbie had started to get in the wrong crowd during middle school. She was becoming distant from me, and it resulted in us drifting apart for some time. Abbie would always call me ‘annoying’ for wanting to hangout with her all the time. She was focused on boys, her friends, and started to become a trouble-maker.
In her freshman year of high school, during lunch, she was hanging out with some friends on the back of a truck when the driver had all of a sudden floored the gas pedal, which resulted in everyone getting knocked off, including my sister. An ambulance was called, and people with the most serious injuries were taken off to the nearest hospital. While at the hospital, our mom had been with Abbie the entire time, always staying by her side. When there, they were informed that she had a major concussion and her back had gotten all scrambled from her falling off. Abbie had been taken to the hospital, incoherent with blood spewing out of her head, and I didn’t have a clue about what happened until I got home.
I remember getting home that day and seeing my older sister, who never wanted to leave her room, sleeping out on the couch. She had a hospital bracelet wrapped around her wrist and had injuries all over. When I saw her, I was terrified. I had no clue what was happening.Once my mom explained to me what happened, I went to my room and didn’t leave because I was so mad that no one informed me. It was a weird time for all of us. Our dad came to visit Abbie, our mom let him come inside to see his daughter sleeping on the couch with a hospital wristband on. Abbie taught me to not change for boys or anyone, and to not do anything illegal like drinking, vaping, smoking or anything else related to that nature; she would always threaten me against such actions.
My sister has always taken on the ‘protective older sister’ role; she would always go inside my middle school to pick me up. Whenever she did pick me up, I was always asked by my peers if she ever bullied or hit me. Everytime people would comment on how ‘scary’ she looked, with her dyed hair, multiple piercings, and blunt personality. Once I told Abbie about the middle schoolers commenting on her so-called ‘scary’ impression, but I knew she was the furthest thing from being a rude, scary older sister. Abbie didn’t care about “immature middle schoolers”, in fact, she thought it was funny. Abbie taught me to not care what people think, don’t be insecure about anything and own up to it.
Abbie and I have been going through a lot together, we’ve had the loss of four close family members pass away in the last six years. We’ve always stayed together, but Abbie is growing up, along with me.
Abbie had decided to move out for a second time at twenty and move in with our grandparents across the United States and attend a Community College in Shrewsbury, Massachusetts. When she told me,”I just booked a one way ticket to Massachusetts”, I was proud of her for wanting to go to college and continue schooling after taking a break since she graduated high school in 2021, but I was honestly scared for the time without her. I was dreading the day she left.
The day Abbie left Missoula, it didn’t hit me that my older sister, who is my best friend, would be leaving me. I wouldn’t be able to hangout with her in person until I left for Massachusetts in the summer of 2024. I wouldn’t be able to hangout with my bubbly, sarcastic sister.
When she hugged me her last goodbye and the last hug that I would get for several months, we both were a mess. Abbie was crying but tried to choke out, “I’ll miss you, and I’ll text you when I land. I love you”. I tried not to cry; I didn’t want her to feel bad for leaving me and wanted her to know I would be okay. Abbie also tried not to cry in front of me, she later told me she sobbed on all of her flights. When my dad and I got back home, I sobbed and had a breakdown; our dad was apologizing for her leaving and was trying to get me to eat some lunch. After crying for almost two hours, I took his offer of lunch. After that, I went back to my room and hid under all of my blankets. The very same day, my older sister and I FaceTimed.
Abbie is accomplishing her dreams of being involved in criminal justice, and I am proud of her for it. We will always be happy for one another and that’s what she taught me: be happy no matter what.
Abbie and I will always cherish the memories we share together, the times she always pushed me off her bed, the silly arguments we have, us being sarcastic to one another, the fun nights when we stay up and play video games or us going out: blasting music and driving. Abbie said those memories are her favorite, “ I laugh and cry sometimes when I think about them”.
Being apart is difficult for both of us, we’ve always been with each other. We’re both learning how to deal with it when it’s been a year. We’ve been Facetiming non stop and talking on the phone, updating each other on things we’re doing, drama at work, school, or just having funny talks.
When I told Abbie that I would be writing an article based on her, she asked, “Why me?”. She then went on, “It just shows you like me better than anyone else and I am just better than everyone else”. Abbie is my sarcastic, funny older sister, and she has shown as well as taught me a lot of things.
No matter the silly fights, arguments or tears, you’ll always be my older sister that supports every decision I make. Soon enough, we’ll become more busy, won’t live in the same house anymore, and will not be able to walk to each other’s room to hangout. We’ll be too busy to Facetime everyday and we won’t share the same last name. I’m most scared of that, but with the knowledge of always having you and being related, we’ll be okay. I will always be proud to tell others that you’re my older sister that has taught me more than others.
